Naming Ceremony
In the modern egalitarian world, the concept of ‘Affirmative Action’ is accepted. The naming of the newborn girl is like affirmative action. Her name is announced in the synagogue at the first opportunity after birth (how? see next page) – while the name of the newborn boy is only announced at the brit milah (circumcision) eight days later. Her name will be called when she sleeps her year at home – while his name will be called at the painful (from his perspective) brit milah ceremony. It is recommended not to use the newborn’s name until after its impressive announcement at the ceremony.
How to choose the child’s name?
Naming a child is the exclusive heritage of his parents, to whom God has given a small prophecy to choose their son/daughter’s name according to his soul. You can ask, consult, but the final word should be yours. Don’t let anyone force you in choosing the name.
Looking for ideas? The internet is full of databases of potential names.
Which names are not advisable to call?
- Names with a negative meaning.
- Weird and strange names that you will regret later that you gave. Take into account the child’s shame all his life, when he has to bear the strange result of your decision…
When do they announce the name of the newborn?
Daughter – during the Torah reading at the synagogue.
On the first occasion you have to go and pray at the synagogue on one of the days when they read from the Torah (Monday, Thursday and Shabbat – every week, on Rosh Chodesh and holidays and fast days) go to the prayer (usually the Shacharit prayer is the prayer where they take out a Torah scroll). Approach the gabbai and tell him your wish. He will recite for you the ‘Mi Sheberach’ prayer and through it you will call your daughter her name.
- Even if you have already announced her name to everyone and even if a long time has passed since her birth, it is worthwhile to go to the synagogue and perform the name-calling ceremony. From a Jewish perspective, this is the way it becomes her name.
- Like everywhere, the synagogue also needs a manager. The ‘gabbai’ is the one who manages the place, prayer arrangements, honors, and other synagogue matters. You can always turn to one of the worshipers who will be happy to help you find the ‘gabbai’.
Son – At the circumcision ceremony
If you didn’t manage or decided during pregnancy how to name your unborn child, you have a few days until the eighth day, the day of circumcision, to decide what name to give him.
Immediately after the mohel performs the circumcision, you will say a blessing where you announce the name you chose – from that point, this will be his Jewish name.
- Why is it important for everyone to have a name?
A person’s name is not only the ability for someone else to call them or for the name owner to open a bank account. A name of a thing expresses and defines its reality and it is the ability to connect to its soul and its spiritual power comes to it. A person without a name is a deficient person. He lacks the ability to connect with his inner essence. This is also the reason why it’s very important to name the newborn as soon as possible. Even if you already named him/her after consulting the ‘family parliament’, from the Jewish perspective he is still nameless until after the Jewish ceremony.
- Why should one ‘adopt’ a Jewish name?
Since a person’s name expresses their essence, it’s worth calling them by a Jewish name from the Bible or the name of one of the great people of Israel throughout the generations. A name has a special ability to influence a person, therefore calling by the name of a righteous person or another special person, can also positively influence your child. It will also serve as a constant model for emulation for the child. It would be a shame to miss that.
- Who will have the last word: the husband or the wife?
You shouldn’t take such an issue to the Rabbinate. Also, consider the newborn who was just born. You need to find in advance the right formula for an equal division in naming the children. The name of the first child will be decided by the husband and the second by the wife and so on. Or vice versa.
- Why is the son’s name given at circumcision?
The first one commanded by God to perform circumcision was Abraham, our father. Along with the commandment of circumcision, God already gave him his new name ‘Abraham’ instead of ‘Abram’.
The Torah scroll letter
After naming the baby, in addition to updating the authorities at the Interior Ministry, it is very worthwhile to also purchase for the child a letter in the special Torah scroll of the children of Israel. This is a Torah scroll that only boys/girls up to the age of Bar/Bat Mitzvah can be partners in.
Purchasing a letter in the Torah scroll (which has 304,805 letters) connects him with a huge amount of additional Jewish children who bought a letter in ‘his’ Torah scroll, and it constitutes a sort of ‘spiritual amulet’ for him. The cost of the letter is about 5 shekels.
After purchasing the letter, you will receive a colorful certificate to your home with the baby’s name and the exact letter you purchased for him in the Torah scroll.
For more details and online purchase: www.kidstorah.org
Peace be upon him (Shalom Zachar)
On the Sabbath following the birth of the son, many have the custom to hold a ‘Shalom Zachar’ – a party to which family and friends are invited and at which pastries, drinks, and snacks are served. At the party, the guests bless the couple and wish the newborn a good and happy life.
It is customary to eat cooked hummus (also known as ‘Arbes’) and other round foods on this evening. The reason for this is that these foods are considered mourning foods, symbolizing the cycles of life. We are as if participating in the sorrow of the infant who has now forgotten all the Torah – after having learned it while in his mother’s womb through an angel.
