Introduction
The Kaddish is a short prayer in which we mainly request that God’s name be magnified and sanctified in the world, and that His kingdom be revealed to everyone. We also pray for the coming of the Messiah.
The version of the Kaddish that we say today was written by the sages of Israel in ancient Babylon (today’s Iraq). The language is Aramaic – the language they spoke in those times.
- Because the Kaddish is in a language that is not familiar to you and it’s hard to pronounce its words, it is advisable to practice this prayer at the first quiet opportunity that comes your way, so you can recite it correctly and precisely, for your honor, the honor of the congregants, and the honor of your dear one.
Types of Kaddish
There are two types of Kaddish that you need to recognize (there are other types, but they do not pertain to you directly, but to the person leading the prayers in the synagogue):
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- The Kaddish called “Orphan’s Kaddish” (or “Yeha Shlama”) is recited by mourners each time after they have read verses from the Tanakh (for example, during the funeral when Torah verses are read, they recite this Kaddish afterward).
- The Kaddish called “Rabbi’s Kaddish” (or “Al Israel”) is a Kaddish recited after studying passages from the Oral Torah (for example, during the prayers).
Click here for the text of the “Rabbi’s Kaddish”
Why do mourners say Kaddish?
There are several reasons for a mourner to say the Kaddish:
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- To cause the praises of God said in the Kaddish and the action they perform, to reflect upon the soul of the deceased and stand in his merit.
- To demonstrate the mourner’s faith in God and his acceptance of His judgment, even after He ‘took’ his dear one.
- The Kaddish causes the sins of the deceased to be forgiven and allows him to ascend more quickly to the ‘Garden of Eden’.
Who says Kaddish?
The first ones who have the right and obligation to say Kaddish for the deceased are his sons. The parent who invested so much in the upbringing of his son, now receives, after his death, part of what he is entitled to for his investment. Moreover, the central duty falls upon them as they are his offspring and continuers of his path, and they have the best ability to affect the soul of the deceased in the upper world.
- A young child who has lost one of his parents, if he can developmentally say the Kaddish, should do so.
A person who died at a young age or childless, the commandment ‘falls’ on the closest relatives. The order of preference is first to those who are close in blood (brothers, parents, and the like), and if none, then the son-in-laws should say it. However, always make sure that the one who says the Kaddish while one of his parents is still alive, asks for his approval and consent. If both are alive, ask for the consent of both.
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- Daughters do not say Kaddish for their parents even when they have no brothers who will say it.
- Although saying Kaddish is very important for the soul of the deceased, the most important thing is that his children walk in good and straight ways.
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- The Kaddish prayer is said for 11 months from the day of burial, as well as on the day of death (remembrance) over the years.
- Efforts should be made to say the Kaddish in all prayers during this entire period.
- Kaddish is only said in the presence of ten Jews (males over 13 years old).
- There is no need to say Kaddish for an infant who died before he reached 30 days after his birth.
- Not sure you’ll manage to say Kaddish every day? It’s worth paying someone who will definitely do it in your place. You can use the Chabad House in your area to find a worshiper who will do it for you. But remember, there is no substitute for your Kaddish, and every time you can, say it yourself!
Why is it important for the soul what we do here for it?
Every Jew has a special soul within him, which is his true essence.
The soul, before coming to the world, was not limited within a physical place, and was more connected and closer to God. There is its natural place, and there it feels much more comfortable than after it descended and physical needs and disturbances began to occupy it.
After death, the soul ascends back to the spiritual world from which it came, and even ascends to a higher place than the place it was before it descended. To where?
Its future location depends solely on its activity here in the world before it ascended. The better it was and its relationship and proximity to God here were greater, its place is now better and higher and closer to God when it ascends.
Then, when it discovers where it is and where it can still reach, it discovers that the abilities to act that would cause it to ascend further have already been taken from it. There, in the upper world, it no longer has the ability to do good deeds that will earn it a higher place.
And here we, the family and friends who remained here, come into the picture. Only we, here in this world, still have the ability to influence the soul that is there – in the upper worlds.
If we perform a mitzvah (commandment) or a good deed on behalf of that soul, we ‘elevate’ it to a higher spiritual level, and provide it with great comfort.
Is your family member dear to you? Help him where he cannot help himself! Do as many mitzvot (commandments) and good deeds as you can on behalf of his soul.
